The Johnson household is set to spend 0.2% of their annual income ‘levelling up’ the fridge.
The elite squad, which collectively have fewer GCSEs than Johnson has harassment allegations, are proving to be more adept at understand what the public wants (namely food).
‘You were only ever meant to read the paper in a sarcastic voice’ said one hack.
We thought of using a dog whistle, but decided that a windbag would be more accurate
After Grand Vizier Dominic Cummings refused to resign, pressure was on the great svengali Dominic Cummings to fire the top Mandarin Dominic Cummings.
‘We’re getting the band back together; with Toby Young on drums, Nick Timothy on Cor Anglais and Andrew Sabisky on bail’.
The UK will pursue an ambitious timetable aimed at delivering an even bigger second coronavirus peak than it’s continent-leading first.
Early reports suggest 2020 will be a record-breaking year for missing governmental targets, beating a very strong performance in 2019.
There haven’t been nearly enough bookshelf scandals in this country, so we imagined what might have been…
The strange, inexperienced and mostly male cabinet only got really fired up when it discovered it could draw a pair of breasts with its emergency powers.