Anna Lugosi
As many foresaw, the historical record has been immediately and irredeemably damaged by the deposition of Colston’s statue in a harbour.
Anna Lugosi
Anna is part of the Pangolin’s highly-competitive two-year Aspiring Apprentice Reporter Trainee Primer Scheme. Once complete, she plans to apply to join the Pangolin Aspiring Apprentice Traineeship Scheme, where she and other successful aspiring trainees will receive some of the most available perks about, including partial travel cost reimbursement and a quarterly day off!
In her spare time, Anna likes to visit family in Geneva and Abu Dhabi, or hit the town with her fashionable friends, but is more often found directing renovations at her Kensington townhouse.
Everyone disappointed to learn that airlines weren’t bluffing
People everywhere have expressed their regret on learning that airlines were telling the truth when they said this would be shit for their staff.
Seriously ill COVID patients ‘were not alert enough’
New medical research suggests that people who are given to ‘drifting off’, or who are just laid back, are at greater risk of coronavirus complications.
Government announces ambitious timetable for bigger second peak
The UK will pursue an ambitious timetable aimed at delivering an even bigger second coronavirus peak than it’s continent-leading first.
Queen to address Britain as it commemorates VE Day
Queen will give a televised message to mark the anniversary of VE Day, as the coronavirus outbreak overshadows nationwide celebrations.
Lockdown easing: prospect of drawing a breast-shaped mortality graph captures cabinet’s imagination
The strange, inexperienced and mostly male cabinet only got really fired up when it discovered it could draw a pair of breasts with its emergency powers.
“Ish’ll all be fine in the end” says quarantined micro-distiller
Bob Morris, 53 from Preston, produces around 50 litres of artisan gin in his shed each week. Normally, he gives much of it away to friends and sells the rest in local shops.
‘China should have acted sooner on UK coronavirus response’ says MP
An extremely credible politician has reminded the public that nothing is ever her party’s fault.
Boris, not to be outdone, renames son ‘52% £350m Routemaster’
The PM, like Grimes and Elon, will name the child after his own clever achievements.
Chelmsford couple spends 48 hours camping out at wrong McDonalds
Maxton and Cathrin Dollop-Smith, both 22, have returned home after spending two nights in a tent outside a McDonalds branch that isn’t scheduled to open.